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A snail buys a fast new car
Panda There was once a snail who was sick and tired of his reputation for being so slow. He decided to get some fast wheels to make up the difference. After shopping around a while, he decided that the Datson 240-Z was the car to get. So the snail goes to the nearest Datsun dealer and says he wants to buy the 240-Z, but he wants it repainted "240-S".

The dealer asks, "Why 'S'?"

The snail replies, "'S' stands for snail. I want everybody who sees me roaring past to know who's driving."

Well, the dealer doesn't want to lose the unique opportunity to sell a car to a snail, so he agrees to have the car repainted for a small fee.

The snail gets his new car and spent the rest of his days roaring happily down the highway at top speed. And whenever anyone would see him zooming by, they'd say "Wow! Look at that S-car go!"

 

Heh, Heh... Good one!

 

Haha, That was a good one about the snail Richard. As for Scotty's previous jokes... I know that its all in good fun, but personally, i try to stay out of political jokes. I mean, we might have a president who isnt that smart and makes some mistakes now and again, but think of it this way. It is either the dumb guy who talks funny and has big ears, or it is the typical lying, two-faced, im-gonna-steal-all-your-money-and-not-give-you-a-dime-back-in-taxes kind of guy. Think about it, he is a democrat. That means that he got all his votes from people on WIC or Section 8 or any other type of welfare. Where are President Bush got his votes from the people that actually get up off their butts and vote. Then everyone in the world has their oppurtunity to say "I hate Bush!"... Well, you had not one but TWO oppurtunities for him to never go to office. Did you ever get off your @$$ and vote? I dont think so. That is why he is in office today. And regardless of who is in office... If Kerry wouldve gone in and not gone to war, you wouldve had the other half of the world calling him a pu**y because that is what he is for not going. And even still, if Kerry wouldve been elected, i would have no bad words for him even though, yes i am admitting it with pride, i voted for Bush... Not because i like Kerry, but because he is our President. I mean c'mon guys... No offense AT ALL to you Scotty, you are still a great friend, but we have a Canadian joking on our President. He might see him in the news, but he doesnt even live here and feel the effects. Imagine how the rest of the world is acting about OUR PRESIDENT... the guy who makes all of our decisions for us. If you guys think you can do a better job than him or anyone of our previous or future presidents, then why dont you just go out and try it? It might take you some years, but eventually you will get there and realize that being the most powerful man in the world doesnt come all too easy. So next time you guys try and take a cheap shot at our president, just put yourself in his shoes and think about the millions of people that are going to disagree with you no matter what you do so you will have to try to use your best judgement and upset the least amount of people. Anyway, thats all i wanted to say about that.


P.S. - As for the Seccession bit about California, Let them leave... We can be the greatest country in the world and the SOUTH will rise again!! LOL.

 

i
i voted for kerry,i am a middle class person not upper classi dont have 100000.00 dollers in the bank, bush is a oil man plain and simple ,and i would run for president but i dont own any oil rigs, bush is a p**ssy, i dont mean to make you mad but what has he done for us.have you ever wached the movie ferinhigt 911 this movie makes bush look like a ***,we are fighting his father 's war, wich we will never win, and just cost this country billions,mean while are american troops are dieing every day for nothing,,,if we had a president like we had 30 years ago we would have nuck them the day they bombed are land, in new york... im sorry i wach cnn every day and it makes me sick,he says things are good. bush i mean. but come on take the blinders off, no jobs. high gas prices, open borders, big buisness ,no more mom and pop shops,heck he cant even rebuild are owne states that get hit buy hurricanes ,false wire taps , and the list goes on, i could go on and on ,,, this goverment makes me sick,,,,,,,i dont no about you but when cliton wsa in there was no defisit and ther were plenty of jobs,,,,,,,,,,,i probley opened up a can of worm's[8D] but the truth hurts.

 

I hear liberal reteric!!! I'm not aiming at anyone in particular, but if the shoe fits............
If our prez can't take a joke, which he can, he would be a woosy.
No, I don't like every thing Bush has done , but I figure he is the least of the two evils.
Clinton? He rode on the success of Reagan's ecconomics. It takes time for the effects to appear.
Clilnton let Bin Laudnum get away.
Papa Bush's war? If the woosy national legislature had let General Powell alone, we wouldn't be there now, at least not to the extent we are. He would have taken care of Sadam.
So now we're supposed to sit back with our arms folded and watch the radical Muslim forces take over the middle east?[:@]
I'm sick of the bleading heart liberals boo hooing about the those killed in the war.
If we hadn't dropped the bomb on Japan or bombed the hell out of Germany, You wouldn't be enjoying the life you have today.
War kills people and breaks things. You don't win a war by dying for your country, you do it by making the other guy die for his. I'd have dropped the bomb a long time ago and I don't care what France or any body else thinks. end it and move on!!!
Keep your eyes closed and Korea and Iran will become a real problem not only to the U. S., but to the whole world.
Realize, these people want YOU DEAD !!!
CNN, Clinton News Network!!! Come on man, think for yourself!!!
The saying use to be, "don't believe anything you hear and only half of what you see." In today's world you can't believe either.
Those with half a brain, from other countries that look at the us, do see a different picture. If you have your nose up against the elephant, so to speak, you don't see the whole picture. But, if you stand back a ways, you're able to take in the complete scene.
The movie 911? That guy is a throw back to the sniveling peacenic hippies. He's a traitor!!!
Bush and I don't care if you slam him or me. We're tougher than that.
Rebuild after the hurricanes? The Lord helps them who help themselves.
Nobody gave a sh*t when I lost everything I had, and I didn't go crying "Unfair, Unfair"!!![] I took care of it myself!!! I didn't hold my hand out for others to fill. Don't like what floods do,MOVE!!! Don't cry and try to stick your hand in my pocket, I'll cut it off!!!

Yes, the truth hurts, you just have to know it when you hear it!!!
O.K., I've said enough, I'm not trying to change anyones mind. Let's just say "Food for thought"! If some one really want's to debate though, let's start a new thread and
GET IT ON!!!

O. K.....Let's get back to havin' some fun here!!! This is about Vettes and havin' fun with Vettes!!! (and with our Bros)

 

Haha, maybe a political thread wouldnt be such a bad idea because i was just about to write a whole other page on this thread until i realized we are still in the Bowtie Lounge. And i dont want to disrespect Scotty and clog up his thread with political crap. So, if you guys wanna talk about it, ill throw my 20 year old political views in there. But, i garuntee half of you wont like it, a quarter will agree with me half of the time, and the other twenty five percent wont care at all.

 

politics, religion and the price of prostitutes....three things you don't discuse with friends.


"But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security...." Declaration of independance

Like our young friend Matty said...If any body in this great country of ours does't like what's going on...they can get off their butts and do something about it instead of wetting the bed all the time. and then there's the old addige ...if you don't like it get the puck out and don't let the door catch you in the a$$ on the way out. If we pulled togather and actualy tried to fix the problems we have here instead of pointing fingers...we just might get some where. after all we are only 236 year old and "the most powerful country in the world. we must have done something right.

While the jokes were beeing told , everybody was getting along. see how that works.

What happend to the f&%kin' jokes?

Lets get back to the jokes...please?

 

here we go

a boy is setting on the curb in front of a church shakeing a small bottle of turpintine watching it fizz.

A priest walks up and says "what do you have there son?

the boy answers "father this is the most powerfullest liquid in the world"

priest: "is it holy water? For holy water is the most powerful liquid in the world. If you place a drop of holy water on an expectant mothers belly she will pass a child.

Boy: " Father, thats nothin' this is turpintine, if you put a drop of this on a cats a$$ he'll pass a motorcycle"

 

love "0 to 200 in just a few seconds", my hubby & I were dying laughing...I'm sure he's already passed it on at the office by now hehe!

 

hay shark thats a lot better than all that political bull crap..nice one